Two weeks ago my older brother passed away. In the end his cigarette smoking led to emphysema which led to fatal pneumonia.  As an ex-smoker I know how difficult it is to quit so I’m not holding anything against him for not stopping.

But that’s not the reason I’m writing this story.

In his will he indicated that he wanted to be cremated.  Honoring his wishes I contacted the National Cremation Society (yes, there is such an organization) and luckily, or I guess expectedly, they had an office in the town where he lived in Florida.  I suspect they have offices in every town in Florida.

The people at the NCS (my abbreviation) were empathetic, polite and helpful in every way possible. Being that I live 1,000 miles away from my brother I needed all the help I could get to carry out his wishes.

After making the appropriate arrangements they told me that they would contact me when his ashes were ready to be shipped. My sister agreed to take delivery of the ashes until his children finalize how they wish to deal with them.

A few days ago I received a voicemail from the NCS.  They said and I quote, “Hello Mr. Brownlee this is the National Cremation Society. We just wanted to let you know that the cremation has been performed and your brother is in the mail.”

I have to be honest.  Hearing that phrase, “your brother is in the mail”, I dropped my phone and broke into the loudest laugh I’ve had in some time.

All I could think of was my brother is now in the hands of the US Postal Service. And I don’t care what anybody says about the efficiency of the Post Office, he was delivered to my sister on time and without an ash being spilled.

True story.